Updated Reading List

Books Read This Year:

1. According to Plan, Goldsworthy.
2. Evangelicalism Divided, Murray
3. Know Why You Believe, Little
4. Encouragement, Crabb

Books in the middle of:

1. Tyndale Commentary of Mark, Cole (*)
2. Evangelism and the Sovereignty of God, Packer
3. The Reformation, Chadwick
4. Concise Theology, Packer (**)

Books wanting to begin:

1. Fundamentalism and the Word of God, Packer
2. Both DB Knox Books
3. The Analects, Confucius
4. Know The Truth, Milne
5. In Understand Be Men, Hammond (*)
6. At the Heart of the Universe, Jensen
7. Difficult Doctrine of the Love of God, Carson
8. How Long O Lord, Carson (**)
9. Cross Centred Ministry, Carson
10. Is the NT History, Barnett
11. Fatherhood, Payne
12. How and Why of Love, Hill
13. Going the Distance, Brain
13. The Cross from a Distance, Bolt (*)
14. NT1 PTC Notes, Moore College (*)

(*) Books coming to Beijing/HK with me.
Hopefully finish by the time I return.
(**) Books coming to NTE with me.
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In the past 2 months I finally finished Murray's Evangelicalism Divided, and read through 2 short books - Encouragement and Know Why You Believe. Encouragement was very useful in terms of thinking more about one on one ministry, but I think I need to read it again, and take notes this time. It had a lot of new, important, ideas.

Know Why You Believe is meant to be a good introductory apologetics book, but like many others (e.g. Strobel) were slightly Arminian leaning, like in areas such as the sovereignty of God. But it does express some ideas in an easy to understand way.

Today I went to Camperdown to the Chinese Embassy to apply for my student visa for Beijing. Afterwards I went to Newtown to have lunch with David, my Cross Coaching Coach. I managed to get 13. and 14. at Moore College, also I purchased a book for Pete Lim, my departing MTS worker - "Justification and Variegated Nomism", ed. Carson, O'Brien, others. I hope its not too complicated; its on the New Perspective on Paul.

Yesterday I gave a talk at our Commerce Social/Training Day; it was meant to be evangelistic, even though there are no non Christians there. I chose the Good Samaritan, which is probably not the best passage to choose when you only have 1 night to prepare. I managed to do it in 2 hours, but I think the structure could have been improved. Hmmm a lot of people doing agree with my interpretation of the passage, but I think its right - basically I said that the GS story is about how we cant be good enough (c/f Gal 3), and so if you imagine yourself as the original audience, then what the parable says to you is that you cant get to God through your good works. I think its true.

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Schedule for next few months:

3/12 Saturday - Canberra NTE
7/12 Wednesday - Back to Sydney at 4pm? Fly to HK at Midnight.
10-13/12 - Not sure if doing something at the time; maybe Xi an to see those Chinese terracotta soldiers? But I'd really like to go to Hawaii if my Dad wants to. They only just went to Thailand last yr, and there are many safe places to go to nowadays around the world.
14/12 Wednesday - Beijing
19/1 Thursday - HK
14/2 Tuesday - Fly to Sydney, Midnight
15/2 Wednesday - Arrive at Noon, go home, go to Kick On Day 1.
15-24/2 Kick On and O Week Events
24-25/2 MKC
27/2 Uni rebegins

I was just thinking about what Pete Ko said a few weeks back in his sermon about planes. How you are so anxious to get off the plane because its going to be so fun once you arrive; and how being a Christian in the last days is like that because we're so looking forward to heaven.

The problem is, the more I think about Heaven and how good its going to be, and thinking about how bad life is now, I just want to go to heaven instantly. The prospect of heaven should motivate me to hang on, but on the other hand, I don't think I can wait any longer. Why cant I just end all the suffering now and go right into heaven? Whats the difference between someone who wont fight on when they have a life threatening disease, and someone who takes his own life? If you believe, like Paul, that to die is gain, and to live is Christ; and you would rather die now than sin again, then basically you want to die anyway. Then whats wrong with suicide?

4/5

I've done 4 out of 5 of my exams. I wish I was finished so much..

Last Tuesday after I got sacked and failed Accounting, I had a History of Maths test on Wednesday, which was pretty easy. The lecturer gave us practice questions in Week 14, then he gave us the exact same paper for the real exam. Whats more, we only had to do 12/25 of the questions. Whats more, we can do as many as we like, and only the best 12 will count. Hopefully I did well, but I definitely pass. Prediction: D

Then I went out for dinner in Eastwood with Grace, at one of those Korean BBQ restaurants. It was pretty nice but Grace doesnt eat food that is red in any way, and then once it gets a LITTLE burnt, she has to pick it out! So very time consuming cooking for her.

Watched Soccer that night of course; I cant believe we won; after 97 I never thought we'd do it, especially with Kewell being only a shadow of his old self.

So I didnt study at all on Wednesday night, and so on Thursday I had to study for 7 weeks of material of Bank Financial Management because I hadnt done anything since the Mid session exam. Thursday was so painful, I cant believe I went thru all that material.. dunno how I remembered it all, but I definitely passed. Prediction: Low C

Didn't do anything on Friday night, just TABS, then didnt do much on Sat, because had to write congregational prayer. Didnt do much study on Sunday either, so yesterday I spent the whole day studying 12 weeks of info sys for the first time, because I havent gone to lectures or done any homework all year, but I crammed all eysterday, hopefully I still did ok today. Im so tired from all the cramming. Prediction: D

Next one is Monday, I need to cram so badly now. But I dont think I can motivate myself to study :( Next Monday - Prediction: F

Love

I was doing some research on love, and how it is used in popular culture, I couldnt believe some of the rubbish I found;

If it’s really love, it just won’t give up

--

I keep falling in love with You ****
Every beat of my heart, breath that I take
Through the seasons that change
Your love remains
My hiding place, my home
Fallin' in love

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all the more shocking because these are hillsong lyrics.

very unwell...

Failed my first ever subject today. I'm 95% sure I failed. Accounting.. stupid stupid accounting.

Also got sacked today. Lost my job that I've been doing for the past 2 years. No more income.

No motivation to even study for the next 4 finals. I want to drop out..


====

Add:

Only when you "fail" in life do you realise how materialistic, how worldly you really are. I should be saying, even if I fail in every endeavour in life, I will still find my purpose in Christ. In theory, you know that being a garbo is as good as being a lawyer, but if you actually was about to go into garbagery, you think to yourself, I've failed.. I say to myself I dont care what career I go into, I could be a financier, an accountant, even an MTSer, but not a bus driver.. (by the way I think that reflects a totally Catholic view of people in full time ministry, and that you find your meaning in your ministry)

Its easy to trust in God when everything in life is easy. But then again its pretty lame of me to be whinging about my situation when others are much worse off.

Last Friday at TABS we were looking at the rich young ruler in Mark 10? Jesus says to the man, one thing you lack, go sell all that you have and follow me. When people preach on this, they say something like, you must put Jesus above your wealth. But that's not what Jesus said at all. Jesus didnt say, you must have me as your first priority, and not love money so much. If Jesus had said that, the rich young ruler would have said.. I can probably do that.. Jesus said to him, sell everything you own, and follow me. I shouldnt read the passage and think, hmm Jesus is saying he's more important than money. Imagine as if Jesus was saying to you, You, give up all your possessions, your house, your computer, your car, your DVD's, your iPods, sell it, give it away, and follow me. Would we really be willing to actually do it? ARE we really willing to do it?

Its easy to look at the rich young ruler and mock, not realising that he is you, and me.

Change in Political Views?

I found this interesting test care of Manny C. I screwed up the code (oops..) but the site is here (http://www.okcupid.com/politics)


I wasnt surprised that I was not socially permissive. What surprised me is that I'm not as free market as I thought.. so much so that I am classified as a totalitarian! Actually in another picture on the site, I was grouped with Stalin and Darth Vader! I was very close to being a Democrat though!

So I thought, I'll try to think back to when I was a non Christian, a few years back, and see how I havent changed politically because of Jesus.



Red Dot is NOW, blue dot is back then.

Evidently I've always been socially restrictive, but I use to be much more free market. I was a capitalist, now im a totalitarian!

Questions that I think I answer differently today include:

- Only literate people should be allowed to vote.
- Most people are too stupid to know what's best for them.
- Employees should have the right to go on strike without the risk of being permanently replaced.

Perhaps today I am much more closely aligned with politicians such as Rudd rather than Costello.

21st's and Heaven

I went to a 21st tonight, and I think this is pretty common at such parties.. after all the speeches, the person having the birthday is quite overwhelmed by seeing all the friends that they have ever had around them. Just thinking about all the friendships, relationships, that you build over the years, it must be such a happy feeling... Seeing that, I thought about something from the bible:

1cor 3:11-16

¹¹For no one can lay a foundation other than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. ¹²Now if anyone builds on the foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw-- ¹³each one's work will become manifest, for the Day will disclose it, because it will be revealed by fire, and the fire will test what sort of work each one has done. ¹⁴If the work that anyone has built on the foundation survives, he will receive a reward. ¹⁵If anyone's work is burned up, he will suffer loss, though he himself will be saved, but only as through fire.

1The 2:17-20

¹⁷But since we were torn away from you, brothers, for a short time, in person not in heart, we endeavored the more eagerly and with great desire to see you face to face, ¹⁸because we wanted to come to you--I, Paul, again and again--but Satan hindered us. ¹⁹For what is our hope or joy or crown of boasting before our Lord Jesus at his coming? Is it not you? ²⁰For you are our glory and joy.

What is the reward that people will get in heaven? It is seeing on the last day, all the people you loved and cared for, and served. The pure joy in seeing that they're held firm to the end, and how because of your ministry to them, they were built up in Christ. In many 21st's of course, there is a lot of phoneyness, and everyone says nice things on the day even though they might really dislike the person. But I think what happens at 21st's are a shadow of heaven.

On the last day, when you see those people, your sunday school class, your bible study group, the person you met up with, and everyone can see the works for what it genuinely is, everyone can see what your motives were, then it will be as though they are all making speeches about you. And these speeches wont be phoney at all, but they will overwhelm us, with people recalling how we served them at our own cost. Then we will see our reward in heaven. That will be our glory and pure joy.

Keep building on the firm foundation of Christ our Lord.

a little unwell...

The last day or so has made it so difficult to trust God, and made me so so depressed. I didnt get my job, which means I have to go to HK (and maybe China) in the holidays, cant stay here because I couldnt find a job (its a parents thing, not like I wouldnt choose to stay here even if i didnt have a job.) The lady on the phone said that they're only been after 2 people and so I didnt get it. I thought that they were looking to hire like 5-10.

But something much much worse happened last night. This group assignment I'd been doing, worth 30% in maths, was due today, and my group told me last night that they were going to kick me out because I didnt do anything.

I was pretty upset because this would mean I'd fail for sure, and that they had given me no notification that they were unhappy with my performance, at least not until the last minute. I figure that if you are unhappy you either inform the person well in advance, or you put up with it. You cant just let someone think they are in the group, then last minute kick him out.

But the thing I was most upset with is my own sinfulness. I knew I hadnt done anything, because I wasnt up to date with my assessments. I wasnt even close to up to date; I'm still on week 1 material. I spent all last night (after I was informed I'd get kicked out) reflecting on this and I just cant stand myself. I cant even start to think of what a bad Christian I am for letting this happen. Its difficulty to reflect on how your own sinfulness and I asked God to strike me down.

I think we say things to each other like, just trust God, trust that his plan is for your good is pretty empty. I know thats what I should do, but when you are really suffering, or really finding it hard to live with yourself, that is pretty ..... just empty words

Vision Sharing

Vision sharing night was pretty good, my only criticism is that Pete didnt tell us that he was going to give a hand out of all his answers, so there I was typing furiously all his answers, only to receive the hand out straight after!! The answers made a lot of sense to me, and the only things that I was still concerned about was:

- in trying to focus on Chinese people, is there a danger in losing focus on the non-Chinese people in our lives. In Pete's answer to FAQ3, he writes "the community closest to us... is not Milsons Point, but the Chinese community". That is true for many at CCC, but for me, I do need to work harder to notice the non-Chinese people around me, because racism in natural in man.

- If many of us at 5pm have non Chinese friends, or have a lot of them, then it would not possible to set up a ministry that caters to them at CCC. This might be hypothetical, but if say.. for 30% of 5pm people, they have a lot of Caucasian friends, and they wanted to start a "non-Asian bible study group", it seemed from Chris' answers, and Pete's FAQ4 ("You may not have many Chinese friends, but I certainly do"), that this group would not be welcomed under the vision. If we had enough white friends to reach a critical mass, why would such a project be neglected? Maybe we could start a 7:30 Eurasian service to suit all the "middle group" that we have (hypothetically, we probably dont have those numbers). At the same time, I think many 5pm people are being selfish in only thinking about the white/yellow distribution of their own friends, completely neglecting the people in the wider church. Our friends might be white, but the children of those in the morning congregation are all Chinese.

- if there is one criticism of the process, that is I think the time between when the rumours of the Vision first began til the vision sharing night seemed so long apart. Some people have been thinking about the vision for so long, when some of those thoughts about about vision were slightly misguided. For example, suggestions that whites would be shot or kicked out, or be made to feel like second class citizens are a bit ridiculous.

Miers Out, Alito In

Those of us who follow the US political scene will surely have noticed this week whats been happening. Cheney's right hand man was indicted, and I think has resigned. Mier's nomination was withdrawn and the new nominee, who will almost certainly be approved in my opinion, is Samuel Alito. Most Christians here don't know whats up with the Supreme Court, so I did some research. Basically theres 9 judges, all appointed by various presidents over the years (all judges are appointed for life) and they make important decisions such as whether abortion is legal or not. This is one of several reasons why Christians are so passionate about politics in the US. Two judges have died/retired recently and Bush has been trying to replace them with conservatives who will vote against things like abortion.

So right now, the court is made up of
- Roberts (C)
- Stevens (L)
- Scalia (C)
- Kennedy (M)
- Souter (L)
- Thomas (C)
- Ginsburg (L)
- Breyer (L/M)
- Alito (C)

C = conservative, L = liberal, M = moderate.

Now that we have gotten rid of O'Day (M/L), we wil have a more conservative court. Whether Roe v Wade (the case that made abortion legal) can be overturned is.. hard to say, but at least it should be limited. For example, late term abortions, etc...

The vision meeting tonight was interesting, but I will blog about it later.